We all have sunburn...

Sunburn. Yes. Sunburn.  Can you believe it?  After having the looongest winter since - who knows - we finally have burnt our skin.  Gross, right?  No. Not at all.  My kids were desperately craving some vitamin D that can't be found in stores. J and I were also in need of some TLC from Mother Nature.  Good day.  

We had this crazy-evil vine that the previous owners of our home planted.  If I had only 3 questions to ask before I died, one of my questions would be to her: Why the hello kitty did you plant this evil, evil vine right next to to the house?  

OKAY STOP RIGHT THERE....I just saw this one Facebook.  The thing about this picture that terrifies me the most ... I believe it and I believe if it isn't already happening...it will.  Very soon.  Yikes to the yikes.  


*I got this off of Facebook ... https://www.facebook.com/pages/Conspiracy-Watch/115534755190836

Now that we all had a privacy breakdown, let's get back to that stupid vine that was growing outside my house.  Well..that's really it.  It's dead now.  We dug 'er up and paraded around the yard with the root in hand, celebrating it's death.  Die evil vine...die.  

I am sad tomorrow is Monday.  I am always sad on Sundays.  Starting the week all over again is sometimes very overwhelming.  I am desperate to find a new soup recipe.  I feel like we have made every soup known to man.  

Here's to an always better tomorrow - cheers!
d.lynn

hey BLOG - what's new?

hi!  hey!  hi!  


so as i write this ... i am listening to sam wind up something .... i won't go in there to see what it is he is winding up because i don't want him to know, that i know, that he is awake.   he could be building noah's ark II and i wouldn't know because i refuse to succumb to his game to keep me awake ... nevertheless....i am awake and blogging about his winding action....someone throw me a life jacket!


i am watching "jersey shore".... am i stupid for loving "jerseylious" better?  i could really care less about, "the situation" and "snookie"..... and all of those other peeps .... but I love, love, love all the staff at the, "gatsby salon" .... i think i spelled that wrong ... 


so a lot of the time after i restart my computer the screen flashes black - it's a REALLLY fast flash and it only happens when the computer isn't plugged in ... probably a virus - dang it 


i am currently laying in bed .... it smells like a hotel.   is that because i am super, duper good at doing laundry or because i suck at it?  hotels are as dirty as they are clean -  i think i just insulted myself ..... dang it. 


my handsome husband is snoring.  i guess that's a fair a trade because i grind my teeth.  you should see me ... i have half a front tooth.  okay - that's not true.   


how pathetic is your life when your husband says, "honey do you want hamms, keystone or milwaukee's best to drink tonight", and then he goes back and says, "no milwaukee's best .... i just can't drink that".  and then i say, " you knew i drank milwaukee's best when you met me - don't judge me!"   that is  a balls to wall true conversation that we had tonight.  not that it matters, but we didn't end up drinking any of the above beers.  oh well.  


sam is currently trying to cox me into bringing him some more water.  his pediatrician told me that he was going to be a politician ....  i would have to agree.  i was ready to dig him a fresh water well just now.  damn that kid is good!  


sam told me tonight he wanted some chocolate milk.  i said no way.  i did however pour him some plain milk.  he decided to pour some chocolate into his mouth after he slammed his milk.  then he started dancing around acting like a fool and rubbing his tummy.  i asked him what the heck he was doing .... he told me he was making his own chocolate milk since i "couldn't".   i told him to milk the chocolate cow.  he didn't understand.  


can anyone tell me why someone would have to buy a dog for medical reasons?  besides being blind.....i am clueless.......  

This is real ... I read this article in the Sheboygan Press

I was reading the Sheboygan Press tonight and stumbled upon this article: 


Police: Two Rivers Woman Seeks Ride to Give Birth; Boyfriend Robs Her For Beer Money 

What the heck is wrong with people?  Let's forget the fact that the victim is a 46 year old pregnant, disabled women who is receiving money from the state for her disability and focus on her mate.  Who waves a butcher knife in a pregnant woman's face and demands money from her?  Although, I don't know why I am surprised by the above article.  Minus the pregnant part - this is an almost everyday occurrence here in Sheboygan.  And the fact that it happened in Two Rivers really strikes me as odd.  We were actually looking to move out that direction to get away from the wonderful people here in Sheboygan.  I just know that if I was in labor and my "boyfriend" starting demanding money from me and was waving knives in my face - the end result would not be him in jail.  It would be much worse!  


Speaking of giving birth - we welcomed our second son, Maxwell Edmund, into the world two weeks ago.  Everyone is doing wonderful!!  He has his two week check-up tomorrow.  I am willing to bet he's gained about four pounds.  Okay, maybe not - but he sure eats a lot!   Sam is adjusting well to his new role as big brother.  I only had one heart stopping moment when he threw something that almost ended up hitting Max.  I am not sure if it was an accident or not - however Sam won't be doing that again.  I think it scared him just as much as it scared me!  


Well for not updating this blog for almost a year - I sure don't have much to say.  Oh well.  


xoxo - diana 

What the Hello Kitty?

Hi Blog Life! - what's shaking?

I am so annoyed right now - with myself. =)

So I was wasting my time poking around Wal - Mart tonight and I saw someone I knew but I didn't really want to talk to. So I detour my random route and stop and look at cereals. While I am comparing Kashi to Special K I had a random thought, (no way - me? random? whatev)... My thought was - Who the heck am I to think I am avoiding them? For all I know and I am willing to bet, they were avoiding me just as much as I was avoiding them. I am annoyingly friendly and I am sure strangers who have no idea who I am avoid me because I always walk around with a big dumb ass smile on my face and if you sneeze - my son and I will say "God bless you" and expect a thank you. Who wants to be recognized for sneezing and then have to thank someone for saying "God bless you" while shopping for tampons? Peanut Butter? Oatmeal? Or in my case nothing?

So I guess the moral of this nonsense blog is - Don't think that you are too good to stop and say hello to someone just because you think you are better then them (because really are we any better then the next person - no), or too busy or just don't have the time to stop and make random small talk. Chances are as much as you don't want to stop and talk - they don't want you to stop and talk.

An idea once - then lost forever

So I was just thinking about what to write in this blog. I just ended with a sassy blog and I wanted to over compensate for the sake of my blog with a happy fun blog. How many freaking times can I use the word "blog" in two sentences? Three I guess. ANYWAY. On a more positive note - I still love SpongeBob! And why not? He's adorable. I also still love Hello Kitty for the same reason. Also VW bugs and fuzzy bunny slippers. Yeah!

A lot of times I can sit down at the laptop and just start writing without any direction or idea and it usually ends with something. Tonight is different. I don't know if it's because I am so discouraged with playing the lottery or if because all of the SpongeBob's today were repeats I didn't like or what. But I am at a loss for words. I guess I could tell you about my day. My day was okay. Okay is okay with me!

I woke up today so tired because of those dang bees and that sassy thunderstorm. But I was able to wake up to two of the most handsome men in this whole world. Now before you really start to think I am a freak - I am talking about my husband and son. Sam made his way into our bed right when the storms started. He's so cute and polite when he comes into our bed. Onto work. Work was good. I left work only to enter "Hell". It had to have been 999 degrees with a humidity level of 200%. It was insane. I was so hot. Once I got home and changed and turned on some air things were fine again. I googled "make money at home scam" only to come across 4,500,000 hits. The most hits yet! Yes!! A new record!!!

Have you ever been to a gravel pit? How much fun are all those stones?

Well I figured my random ramblings would turn into something I had fiery passion for - but no such luck. Story of my freaking life. Much like playing the lottery - no such luck. So my husband just got home. He told me he wanted a hair cut, I told him to take off his pants. He said why and I said why not. It was a weird conversation.

Night! - diana

TINKLE

Who the heck made up the word "tinkle" to reference the act of urinating?

A couple of things going on in my life ...

My in-laws visited this past weekend - my Step Mother - In - Law thinks I am weird. Big surprise! Thanks Judi! =)

A handsome co worker who will remain nameless for the sake of his own pride has been taking my FEMALE vitamins. Now know, I only referenced him as handsome so you would make the assumption he was a male. He'll be alright. =)

Honey Bee's have taken up residency in our townhouse wall. I am a big fan of not killing things that shouldn't be killed - however ... for the love of the queen bee could you shut the hell up between the hours of 12:00 a.m. and 5:00 a.m.? I would like to sleep. They can make honey at any time of the day - that's like their job. Although I did read some speculation that once the bees start to disappear that's the beginning of the end of man kind as we know it. I always knew women would rule the world. Perhaps I should exterminate these peckers?

Brett Micheals played at Sheboygan's Brat Days this past weekend. I know I am a nobody compared to his skany life - but I would like to volunteer some advice to Mr. Brett Micheals. Don't come back to Sheboygan. You didn't do a good job.

I feel slightly salty tonight. I think it's conveying into my blog. My happy fun blog is now a salty downer blog. Boo.

So this summer so far - blows. It's been either cold and rainy or hot and humid. Neither of which work well for my hair type.

On a more positive note, I played the lottery the other night. I didn't win. That's good because it shows that something is consistent in my life.

My baby turned 3 this past week! 3!! I am so proud of him! He's so smart and so handsome - and now so old!!!!

TaTa for now!!
Diana

Michael Jackson - is ALIVE - I told you ...

Okay, okay, okay. I know he's not "physically" alive (or is he? I think he is - dang it), however he's soon to become the fire that burns bright in every woman's heart. I read on some web site that they (they?) are planning on turning locks of MJ's hair into DIAMONDS. Okay, so diamonds are my best friend, Michael Jackson screams my name in "Dirty Diana" and I think the combo of both is a beautiful thing ... but hello - is this not weird? Obviously the amount of money this "diamond" is going to bring in is huge. And everything else that has to do with Michael Jackson and his freakish life are just as strange - but why would someone think it would be a good idea to create diamonds out of his hair? I believe it's disrespectful to the dead (?) man's body and whoever buys these diamonds would be completely weird. Although I am not going to lie - I will look for the diamonds on ebay. I guess this whole diamond process will just reconfirm the strangeness that encased his life.

Anyway - a few things that are on my mind right now ...

Where the hell do fruit flies come from? No, I don't have any yet but I just wonder? One time my friend Balls and I found an old bag of powdered sugar. It was like a college campus of fruit fly eggs. I don't want to mention, but I will, the old potato that I found right next to it. I suspect that was the source of the bugs but wow. They totally grow out of nowhere. Did the human population start out of nowhere too? Look at how easy it is for fruit flies to establish a system off of a rotting potato - let alone where the humans started. On Planet X I am sure =)

I love watching Law & Order SVU. I totally think that Elliot and Olivia should just do it. And by "it" you know what I mean. I love those two together. I need to get a life ....

I was going to buy Sam an ant farm for his birthday - well I didn't. I realized that the gift would have been more for me then my son. I love ants. They are amazing creatures. They give true meaning to teamwork and loyalty more then humans do. Perhaps ants were supposed to be the prime life form on earth and humans just grew too big and crushed them? Perhaps I will ask for an ant farm for my birthday instead of those adorable bunny slippers I found. Probably not. I will build my own ant farm!

Okay so this post is so long and so random --- the story of my life!

Anyway - I ended up buying Sam an adorable "Cars" block thing that he picked out (no ant farm) and I need to go to bed!

xoxo - have a beautiful night! diana